What do you call a rabbit with fleas?Bugs Bunny.
Q: What goes up and never comes down? A: Your age.
What do you always get on your birthday? Another year older!
What is worse than ants in your pants? Uncles
I want to die peacefully in my sleep, like my grandfather.. Not screaming and yelling like the passengers in his car.
A mate of mine has just told me he’s sleeping with his girlfriend and her twin. I said how can you tell them apart, he said ‘her brother’s got a moustache!'
A ship with a cargo of red paint collided with a ship carrying a load of blue paint. The passengers were marooned!!
Morning Gang!! You're riding a horse at full gallop, with a giraffe next to you & a lion nipping at your heels.What do you do?......Get off the carousel & sober up !!
Joe, so about 65 miles South of Inverness then ??
HE WENT IN A FORWARD DIRECTION
Joe, which direction did he go ??
Derek05. Grandad is only 65 miles away.has he phone
When Grandad reached the age of 60, he decided to walk 5 miles each day. He's now 73 and we have no idea where he is !
To achieve inner peace, always finish what you start, so today I finished 3 packets of crisps, 2 Mars Bars and a bottle of wine.Feeling better already !
Indeed we will MadB, this helps keep us sane (ish).The world tongue-twister champion just got arrested. I hear he's getting a tough sentence.
Guys, guys, stop!! I am crying......with laughter!! You are all so funny & I hope everybody's laughing with me!!Chins up all, we will get through this !!